the real question is: why do i feel slightly guilty for lounging though i'm sick and on vacation? i've seen people: dad, maternal extended family-- cousins, aunts, uncle, grandmother, oh my!--, best friend, best friend's girlfriend, lots of mom time. i wrote a sermon; i wrote newsletter articles. got the car aligned-- headed off potential flat b/c guy at tire place found nail in tire. somehow i still feel unproductive. i'm not supposed to be productive!! i'm on vacation! i'm sick! what's wrong with me?! wait; don't answer that.
most of the guilt is due to my old room at my mom's stares at me accusingly:
still
full
full
full
of
my things
my things
my things
- middle school jewelry from claire's strewn on the desk
- clothes, including the prom dress, the wedding dress, my favorite dress from high school
- books, books, books, everywhere, and nothing to read
- any and all things ballet-related, trinkets on the dresser, posters on the walls, tutus in the closet, everywhere
- dolls, including two american girls(ppb-- direct me to your post)
- drawings from art class
- reply cards from the wedding
- and i moved a lot of things out last october, into my home with the mr., but it's not enough.
is it ever enough?
am i ever done?
i'm fairly process-oriented, generally okay with not doing something concrete and tangible with, well, with my life, but every once in a while, it grates on me.
HEY! every once in a while? go. away. now. (please.)
2 comments:
You must move out by the time you're 30. That gives you a few years.
And for some reason, the phrase, tutus in the closet makes me laugh.
Sorry you are sick. My mother made me put it all in boxes and finished the rest herself. Most of it is in their attic melting in the sun. I don't want it in my house - no room.
Don't worry about it now - there is time.....
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