the post about passports

the other day, when i saw the package from the us government, i spent several seconds trying to figure out what i had done wrong. then i remembered: passport renewal. have you seen the new ones? they're rather high-tech, or at least they seem so when you compare it to the one i was issued in '98, with my picture just pasted in it, not digitally scanned.

and, on an equally important note, if anyone can figure out how to make their legs shave themselves, please tell me.

the post about guilt (extended disco version)

i love it when i live in to stereotypes, don't you? i go on vacation; i get sick. i have some type of bronchitis. meh. oh, well. what can you do?

the real question is: why do i feel slightly guilty for lounging though i'm sick and on vacation? i've seen people: dad, maternal extended family-- cousins, aunts, uncle, grandmother, oh my!--, best friend, best friend's girlfriend, lots of mom time. i wrote a sermon; i wrote newsletter articles. got the car aligned-- headed off potential flat b/c guy at tire place found nail in tire. somehow i still feel unproductive. i'm not supposed to be productive!! i'm on vacation! i'm sick! what's wrong with me?! wait; don't answer that.

most of the guilt is due to my old room at my mom's stares at me accusingly:

still
full
full
full
of
my things
my things
my things

• middle school jewelry from claire's strewn on the desk
• clothes, including the prom dress, the wedding dress, my favorite dress from high school
• books, books, books, everywhere, and nothing to read
• any and all things ballet-related, trinkets on the dresser, posters on the walls, tutus in the closet, everywhere
• dolls, including two american girls(ppb-- direct me to your post)
• drawings from art class
• reply cards from the wedding
• and i moved a lot of things out last october, into my home with the mr., but it's not enough.

is it ever enough?
am i ever done?

i'm fairly process-oriented, generally okay with not doing something concrete and tangible with, well, with my life, but every once in a while, it grates on me.

HEY! every once in a while? go. away. now. (please.)

the post about mom's house

i'm at my mom's house. i think all the major crashing i did after exams in college in this space made me associate it with sleep. i can barely keep my eyelids open, and it's not even 9 p.m. on a friday. zzz...

the post about this weekend

this weekend:

• senior voice recital of one of the college students (can't go to all of the recitals, but i go to at least one-- senior is kinda the last chance)
• painted porch swing (one coat primer, two coats exterior white)
• preaching galore: about how questions shape the answers we receive and death (freddie the leaf story for family and children's service)
  
• first fire in the fireplace
• church hosted social gathering for ppl who are the same ethnicity as the refugee family the church is sponsoring. one of the other refugee families was in a car accident on the way home-- car went off the road, the driver overcorrected into oncoming traffic on two lane highway. mother- dead. baby- dead. aunt- dead. father and 3 yr old in critical condition. to come so far to die here.
  

the post about 10 things

pastor peters tagged me, so here goes:

1) when i flip through the channels, i have a hard time not stopping on bad fashion reality TV like project runway and america's next top model.

2) the holidays are hard for me, but not for the regular reasons; they're hard b/c i miss being in the nutcracker.

3) one of my pet peeves is people who are over the age of twenty-one or so and think they're so unique that no one can understand them. come on. we're all different, sure, but come on. get over yourself.

4) i've been to every continent except for antarctica.

5) i'm completely addicted to my own endorphins. i get moody if i don't work out.

6) my in-laws and my mom went to high school together.

7) i love target, but who doesn't?

8) i wash my car about once a year. we don't water our lawn.

9) i'm going to start blogging for my job soon.

10) i think i might be getting sick, which is a total bummer.

i think everyone whose blog i read has already done this, so i'm not going to tag anyone :)

the post about giving blood

i gave blood today.

the first time i gave blood was about eight years ago, as part of a college blood drive in which ms. rev's school was pitted against its most hated sports rival. the woman who found my vein (i use the word 'found' rather loosely here) did an awful job. i could feel the needle the entire time. i was sweating profusely (not glowing, or perspiring, or whatever. sweating). i almost fainted afterwards. it was one of the most awful things i'd ever done voluntarily (voluntarily). i quickly became one of the 95% of people eligible to give blood who yet does not. plus, hated sports rival got more blood than we did; my blood-letting was all for naught.

fast forward to now. several kids in the parish have cancer (yes, more than one). one of them hosted a blood drive at a local bank probably about 8 months ago. i wouldn't go so far as to say i liked it. i mean, really. let's not kid ourselves here. it's just that giving blood wasn't the horror show i remembered it being. other than the fact that the people are always disturbed that i've been to kenya (in june 2005), and other than the fact that, in this day and age, they have to verify EACH TIME that the area is "okay" (i'm actually not convinced that i was not in a malaria zone; i also think that the malaria would have shown up by now), it's not so bad. today i got a great apron. i tried to post a pic, but it was HUGE. the apron says, "i love pumpkin pie," except it says, "I (heart) (picture of pumpkin) (pi math symbol).

the moment i saw it, i was happy that such an apron was now in my possession because...

• the mr.'s grandmother gave relentlessly to the disaster relief section of the american red cross (carried a pager and everything). he'll love that the apron is from the red cross.
• the mr. loves my pumpkin pie (yes, i bake. sort of).
  
• the mr. loves math. he bought a calculus book FOR FUN the other day. ... yeah.
• the mr. loves to cook. cooks need aprons. it's a scientifically proved fact.
  

normally i would try and wait and give it to him, but i couldn't. i put it on right as i walked in the door last night.

i wrote the kid a card: "thanks for helping me get over myself. go socks!"